So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
