on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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