fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
