I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
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