So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
