ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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