his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
