Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize