come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize