this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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