the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
