So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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