who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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