I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Randomize