The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
A bitchslap is in order.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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