hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
