no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I'm passing your future prison.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
