I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
