i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
