it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Need sex. Gaining weight.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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