White coat. Heels.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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