Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
