when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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