Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize