you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize