I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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