boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
