i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
