dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
BRING THE BAGELS
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
