Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize
