omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Randomize
