oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
