I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
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