I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
