Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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