That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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