Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Everything about him screamed your future.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
