Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
