Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
