I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
