I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
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