im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
