I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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