quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
