So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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