i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
