Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
