Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
