No, you can still breathe under the balls.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
