yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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