Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
