I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
