I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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